If I were a poodle, I would try to be the best poodle ever. Why? Because poodles, like beagles, tend to have a bad rep amongst most people I know, at least, and I want [...]

I can sum up about 95% of what last night’s news was about: the blizzard of March 17th-18th. Reporters were delivering up-to-the-minute information on a “winter storm” that was on its way to Minnesota, scraping [...]

So, I went to my first ever court appearance today to get my driving privileges back. Woooo HA! One would think the process was as easy as:1. Go to court2. Talk to judge3. Pay some [...]

11:42pmSo, here I am back in my hometown of Cottage Grove, MN where all of this suspended license bullcaca began nearly a month ago (read the ol' blog entry here if you haven't yet). It's [...]

I played news reporter today on my homey VomitGod's blog... read it and weep as I huff a gentle breath upon my fingernails and buff them on my shirt.(ps - While you're over there, be [...]

I don't know how things work where you live, but here in the Twin Shitties, our local television stations go above and beyond to craft 30 second advertisements featuring their newscasters hanging out dressed in [...]

Preface: I am not being a kiss-ass here and am by no means a rock critic – I’m just presenting my honest opinion about a band I believe in and hope makes it (whatever “making [...]

Have you ever tried to not think before? It's pretty damn hard, because you tell yourself "Okay, I'm not going to think right now. I'm not thinking. I'm not thinking..." but technically you are thinking [...]

I was walking down Harriet Avenue in Uptown the other day and heard a pigeon in the distance. I didn’t know it was a pigeon at first – it was sort of muffled and hard [...]

Lady on sidewalk: "Here, you should read this!"Me: "Huh?" Lady on sidewalk hands me small booklet and continues walking.If you've walked around in the city, chances are you know what I'm talking about: Human Jesus [...]

That there is the title of a yet-to-be-finished Iced Ink song and it goes quite nicely with today's journal entry topic: stoplights.While executing a donut run to SA, I was waiting for the light to [...]

As I sit here enjoying my potentially hazardous Freon-encrusted/scented/contaminated can of Diet Coke, I'm listening to one of the CDs I haven't sold out of my collection yet that I can never get enough of. [...]

I don't really understand it... we were driving home last night and before I knew it (or even thought it), my mouth was open and spewing these words: "Man... root beer really sounds good right [...]